I have never been pursued
by a mob of torch-wielding peasants,
but I have been challenged by flame-throwing tanks
and sophisticated fighter jets

(which turned out to be tiny models).

Professor Jujitsu warned of this scenario
at an emergency session of the U.N.
(broadcast live on all major networks*).

He prophesized great doom,
should the plan of Militia Chief Yumatoasto
be adopted...

"The power lines will explode for no apparent reason,
casting bright sparks in every direction!"

"I fear this unlikely contrivance
of mobile oscillators and atomic detonations
will only empower the monster!"

Ambassador Hitherto then led the assembly
in ecumenical prayer,
requesting divine intervention
in the form of alien spacecraft

which never materialized.